Throughout my life I’ve never been that girl with a lot of friends. Growing up an only child made me a situational introvert. My husband, however, has friends that he’s known since elementary school. I’m always envious of that. He’s managed to maintain friendships for well over 20 years and here I am barely with a couple long-term friendships.
In 2013, Drake released “No New Friends” and I distinctly remember it being the hottest phrase of its time with lots of people sadly rejecting the idea of new friendships. Why? Because of the insinuation that new friends possess no loyalty and can’t possibly have your best interests in mind and heart. I disagree, so let me tell you why the saying “no new friends” is a thing of the past.
It, quite frankly, mentally handicaps people into thinking there’s something wrong with seeking and welcoming new friendships. Any “old friend” was once a new friend, right? There are people that I have known my whole life who are not loyal or dependable at all. The flip? I have friends I’ve known for shorter periods of time that I can rely on much more so than my old friends.
I always welcome any growth to my circle of friends. Let me tell you why. The older I get, the more I find it highly beneficial to meet people who are like-minded and bring value to my life. You should be constantly changing and in doing so need new people to stimulate you through life. In some cases, old friends might accomplish this and that’s ok too. In self-improving, I make a conscious effort to seek friendships with those possessing knowledge and positive vibes. I like being pushed and feel that real friends do that. How does the saying go? “You are the sum of the five people you surround yourself with.” Be sure to surround yourself with people that are going to elevate you. Don’t ever sell yourself short.
Becoming a mother also changed my relationships with friends without children. It wasn’t intentional but in reality, it was hard to balance motherhood with life outside the home. I can assure you it’s a lot easier to be friends with other mothers. They understand the busyness of life and can help you through parenthood. This goes back to finding friends that are relatable. Other parents understand where you are in life.
As I do life, I need new friends to push me to new limits and bring a different outlook on life. If you once thought against welcoming new friendships, I encourage you change your mindset. I’m constantly telling my husband this because he’s notorious for using the phrase “no new friends”.
Here’s to those new friendships waiting to be blossomed. Give new people a chance to know you and give yourself a chance to know them. Gaining new friends doesn’t have to replace your old friends and absolutely doesn’t mean your old friendships are less valuable. Do you agree or disagree?
I love this article! It’s so true and I’ve been going through this lately. I’ve held onto toxic friendships due to us having a history together as childhood friends, when in reality we were on two totally different points in life. This was helpful!
I’m so glad you found it helpful. I feel you on that toxic friendship situation. I’m learning that sometimes you just outgrow people and vice versus. It’s okay to want to protect your peace. Relationships are two ways streets and they have to want it just as much as you.